The big saw-off – aka never give a girl a power tool

Up until a couple of weeks ago, we had a massive tree at the bottom of the garden, that seeded everywhere and blocked out all the light. So it had to go. I negotiated a good deal with a ‘man what can’, and got a discount if I disposed of all the branches myself and he just took the trunk away.

So, last weekend, dressed in sensible lumberjack attire of shorts and vest-tops (goggles are for wimps), my friend and I set to work.

We set up the circular saw on the decking, and were having a fine old time. I fed the logs in, she brought the mighty saw down on them and sliced them like butter. All nearly went ‘pants up’ when I accidentally put my wrist near the spinny blade – but the near-scare made us just be a little more careful.

Anyway, we must have set the neighbours off, as we heard a sawing noise coming from the house that backs on to us – they were tidying up their Leylandii. My friend and I were now rather bored of sawing, and were imagining the hunky lumberjack types on the other side of the hedge, so we entertained ourselves by feeding logs into the saw in a provocative manner, and bending over to retrieve logs rather more often than was really necessary.

Imagine our surprise when two heads popped through the foiliage, and they had an average age of about 102.

Foiled again…


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